REQUEST: There Is Always A Choice (Train x Saya)

This had to have been the third of fourth time this girl had joined Train on the rooftop. Ever since that first day, the cat he fed hadn’t shown up; it was as though Saya’s presence had forced Black Cat out of his mysterious world, into the light of the day, despite the starlight they spoke under.  He couldn’t decide if he liked it or not, but ever still, her words floated through his head…

A pistol’s job is what it’s handler chooses. If I don’t wanna shot, I won’t.

It seemed flawless simple, but it brought a lot of confusion to the assassin’s mind. He’d spent years as one of Chronos’ best, killing and taking orders without a second thought. He’d never chosen whether or not to shoot before; it had been instinct, and even more so, it had been expected.

He shook his head, trying futilely to banish these thoughts as he turned his eyes to Saya, just barely catching what she’d been saying, “You know, you look pretty lonely up here all the time. I never do see the cat you’re supposed to be taking care of.”

Shrugging, Train brushed off her words, “I’m just… here to think, I guess.” He paused, wrapping his trench coat tighter around his body before he nodded at her, voice a bit sharper than was necessary, “I mean, you’re just here to drink my milk and lecture me. What’s your deal?”

Saya froze at his words, swallowing the milk she’d been chugging before setting the half-empty bottle down on the rooftop beneath her feet. A frown flashed in her eyes as she told him, “I’m not trying to lecture you, Train. I’m just saying… maybe you could use a friend, once in a while.”

Her offer seemed so innocent, so easy. She didn’t understand. “I can’t,” he told her, “You’ll just get hurt hanging around me, Saya.” His heart ached at the very thought, voice softening, “I can’t let that happen to somebody as sweet as you…Saya.”

Sometime during this, the girl had moved closer to him, her hands clasped delicately behind her back. She leaned in closer to him, where he sat on the roof, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.  ”Don’t be silly,” she reassured him, “I’m not gonna get—”

He’d leaned forward, ready to silence her with a quick kiss before taking his leave, but he never got that far. The cat he’d been waiting for all this time jumped between them in that instant, making the two flinch back. Saya’s eyes were wide as she spoke, first cheerfully, “Hey, your little friend’s back!” Then her eyes narrowed, voice accusing, “You were so trying to kiss me! You pervert!”

"I was not," Train snapped, crossing his arms defensively over his chest. After an awkward pause, he moved to  grab the bottle of milk, pouring it into the cat’s dish and watching the little creature drink. "There, that’s done," he muttered too quietly for her to hear, then turned to face Saya again. "I should.. get going, Saya," he told her, starting to run away again.

"Hey, wait!" the girl chirped, dashing forward to grab Train by the arm as she said, "You know, we’re not that different—"

The Number wasn’t listening anymore. “—We are different, Saya. More than you understand.” From the first day we met, I saw how care-free you were… You’ll never be like me, and you will never understand.

"How are we different?" Saya pouted, arms crossed over her chest as she starred at him.

Train actually laughed a little, but it was a bitter sound. Shaking his head at her, his reply was nearly cryptic, “You chose when you shoot, Saya. I don’t. And being around me… you’ll get hurt, probably die, there’s no doubt in my mind.”

For a second, it looked like the girl might’ve started to cry, but she swiped at her eyes before he could know for sure. “It doesn’t have to be like that, Train,” she whispered, “There is always a choice…”

* * *

We’re not that different.

You chose when you shoot, Saya. I don’t.

There is always a choice…

All that time later, and still the Sweeper’s  words were trapped in Train’s mind. Now, with his barrel pointed at somebody’s head, he realized just what Saya had meant… It doesn’t matter if you’ve been ordered to do something. At the end of the day, you’re still the one who chooses to pull the trigger. And sometimes, you shouldn’t.

"I was ordered to end you," Black Cat spoke lowly, clicking the safety back into place on his gun. His golden eyes flashed as he nodded towards the alley that the man stood in, "I suggest you disappear, and don’t ever come back… the next Number to find you might not be this generous."

But it wasn’t generosity that kept Train Heartnet from shooting that man as he turned his back to him and stalked out of the alley.  It was part-Saya, part mercy, and part independence.

There Is Always a Choice…